Like so many other artists I suffer from perfectionism. The more I look around me and see others, including those whom self-label themselves and many others as non-artists I notice that, gee whiz, so do many others. In fact, there are people whom suffer from this terrible imperfect affliction to such a level that they can not admit it, for doing so would mean they are imperfect. Having an affliction of any sort is a sign of imperfectionism, isn't it? Perfect beings are perfect by the word's very definition and thus have zero afflictions. So if I seek to cure myself of perfectionism, does that mean I am seeking perfection then? One less affliction and one more step towards perfection? Doesn't sound like a cure does it, but a step towards the very problem, eh?
Even this simple blogging tool, called Blogger, has so many little bugs we all can notice if we so chose to. It can drive one mad, and it often does feel like a crudely concatenated set of features at times. But it works, it's neat, and I can share my opinion on it so I use it. But there are days man, when I want to learn how to hack, break into Google, and fix all that bothers me. This is a part of my perfectionist problem that I tame very often and instead of becoming part of anonymous, I meditate, write music, and a few blog posts like these. For I know the dark side of this terrible affliction and it leads to stagnation, for the most part. Trying to achieve perfection in a blogging tool is, well, akin to making the perfect restaurant dish. It's impossible - not because there isn't a perfect pasta sauce, which there isn't, but because you can not please all the people all the time. What we as coders can do though, in terms of fixing Blogger for example, is either fixing things, or giving user the choice to turn on and off features that we may or may not like. By giving choice to the user how the interface works, we all not for perfectionism, but for customization of experiences. And that is perfection in itself. Best analogy I can think of is instead of a bicycle on streetcar tracks, which is the current model of Web 2.0ness, we can give the user a grip on the handle bars and let them ride around their chosen path. In case of Blogger, if the designers feel a certain aspect of the experience is traditional blogging, they can give an option to turn on or off this traditional experience, instead of forcing it upon the user. Key example would be the current state of GMail. The interface forced conversations upon us, a threaded interface, and then an option of non-threadedness was added. But there still is no checkbox for "Show me emails I replied to" anywhere! Even, I think, a CLI tool such as Pine, has the option to show what emails I have responded to, and that is a tool from decades ago without a graphical interface nor mouse access originally. The very first versions of MS Outlook and Yahoo from the '90s all showed emails we replied to so we don't reply to them again. Do not force the interface, but give the user a choice to turn on and off a set of features. Sure you are the designers of experiences, but you know, there's a fine line between a restaurant experience and a restaurant controlling even conversations we can have, eh? This is perfectionism - not giving users a choice.
Similarly perfectionism occurs with us artists on a grander scale. Right now as I write this I am demonstrating my perfectionism. I refuse to write outlines for my posts. Then pick the best words, then edit, then re-edit, and make more succinct. Instead I write a SoC (stream of consciousness) and then I hit post. For the most part it is a deeply rooted belief that this is going to be an amazing post the first time I write it, for another part, it is just fun and it feels like I'm talking to someone when nobody is present, and since one can not edit live conversations I suppose it's a sort of a pretend thing that I can not edit the blog. Even though I can, I choose not to - and it is a sort of a perfectionism. Clearly blog posts are not live words, I am not "LiveBlogging(TM)" which could've been a thing, but isn't. This is editable text. Imagine writing a book live without editing. If Jurassic Park was written that way it probably wouldn't have been as a great page turner. Even me, a man suffering from low vision, read it almost in one sitting! Writing it the way I wrote this post would've made it perhaps way longer or shorter or different or less fun for the most part.
The one place i never do perfectionism though is in music. If you believe yourself to be a perfect being, you will have no need to edit your work, right? So whatever chords I play on the piano will sound perfect the first take - and they never are and they never can be. In fact, this is why many people avoid music, for it shows them just how imperfect, how human, they truly are. This is why many avoid sports - it always demonstrates how imperfect the person is. If you try to play soccer and you miss your desired target the first of a thousand times, it says something to your psyche like "You're not a God, you need to practice, repeatedly!". It took me almost 3,000 hours of play to get to the level of game play that I'm at myself, and I'm not even that good. With music, it's the same thing, I've been composing for decades, and I'm still not even close to the likes of BT and DM. Clearly there is a difference in our brains, and our psyches, but also in our equipment and our social support circles. All of this is integral to success in any field. If you are avoiding sports, music, or any of these simple arts, even crafts, it is possible you are suffering from perfectionism - the sheer belief that you are better than the rest of us mere mortal machines whom must repeat things over twenty times just to get close to right, let alone close to perfect. When I work on a track and I'm choosing an instrument, it can take me over two hours just to pick the right cello, for example, and get the notes right. Imagine that, two hours of fiddling with a thousand adjustments all so it sounds... "right". With soccer, for example, I can spend five hours just kicking the ball in place up and down until I accomplish a move that I set out to that day. Five hours! Does that make me perfect or as far from it as possible? This is not a realization many want to accept into their perfect little lives.
So many avoid sports and music and even arts and thus believe themselves not to be artists. This is why I said self-label of non-artistic at the top. We are all artists if we so choose to be. Do not force yourself to be an artist though. It might mean you are giving in to perfectionism - the desire to overcome every flaw is a perfectionist thing. I don't write music to be better and better, nor do I play soccer to get to that perfect play level of Pele. Instead, what I do is what I need to in order to have fun and experience joy without harming others around me nor myself. That's my secret sauce to happiness and I hope you enjoyed it. Don't be a perfectionist, it sucks the perfect life right out of you. As for me, I am still debating whether at a later date to edit this post so it's less... perfect.
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